I see my ex (who dumped me) smoking (which I have a fetish for… she also doesn’t smoke in real life), but then she leaves and after I decide to go looking for her, I can’t find her. We’re in St Andrews - the town where we met and now both work in, albeit for separate companies. There are also baby hippos running around and people are trying to find/catch them, but I ignore this in pursuit of finding my ex.
This dream is multi-layered and rich with symbolism, reflecting both your current emotions and your subconscious mind at work. Let’s break down the various elements:
Your Ex: Seeing your ex, especially someone who dumped you, suggests unresolved feelings. It could be a longing or a need for closure. It's possible that you're still dealing with feelings of rejection or loss, and these emotions are being processed through your dreams.
Smoking Fetish: In your dream, your ex is smoking, a behavior you find attractive, even though she doesn't smoke in real life. Dreaming of her doing something that draws you in reflects your desire to see her as alluring or irresistible. This might be an expression of an idealized version of her or your relationship, possibly highlighting what you miss about it or what you wish to recapture.
St Andrews: This town represents a significant place in your life—a location tied to both your personal and professional history, and more importantly, your relationship with your ex. It symbolizes familiarity, but also the complexity of your shared experiences and the connection that is still present because you both work there, albeit separately.
Searching for Her: This symbolizes your quest for understanding or resolution about your feelings or the relationship. Not being able to find her may reflect feelings of frustration or acceptance of the situation being out of your control.
Baby Hippos: These creatures could symbolize innocence, curiosity, or playful aspects of your personality or current life situation. People trying to catch them might represent societal rules or pressures—to manage, contain, or control different aspects of your life. Your decision to ignore them suggests that you’re prioritizing your personal emotional journey over other distractions or responsibilities at this time.
Overall, this dream seems to be about longing and unresolved emotions connected to a past relationship, amidst other life experiences and distractions. It might be helpful to reflect on what aspects of the relationship or your past are meaningful to you and consider what closure or understanding you are seeking. Understanding your current feelings towards your ex and the relationship will provide insight into what actions you might want to take moving forward.